While I was at church, I was so distant from everyone. I wanted to be to myself because I was hurting, but with feeling that hurt, I still felt joy. I guess you can say, that is the God that I serve. It felt like He was letting me know that even though I felt what I was feeling, He was still there, present in my heart.
I was so stubborn at church, to the point I did not speak to anyone. I tried to run out of the church before my pastor seen me because I did not want to cry,lol. It is funny to me now as I replay my actions, in my head of that morning!!! I did not want the tears to release from my eyes; But my pastor caught me and to my surprise I did not cry. I have gotten to a point in my life that I am so tired of crying…Is that a bad thing? I don’t know. I know that it does heal the soul. Because every time I cry, I feel better (depending on what the situation is) however,
I felt better after I left church, I felt rejuvenated, I felt like the spiritual bondage I was in, had left my spirit.
I learn in church, and this is confirmation to my spirit: is that, you need to prepare yourself each day by: Praying to God and telling him to prepare you for anything that the devil tries to throw at you. So, for now on when I wake up in the morning, I am going to pray to God and tell him to prepare me for any NONSENSE that idiot (satan) tries to throw at me.