Two days ago, I questioned God about my life? When my mother had an abortion, why wasn’t I the chosen one to die? I decided to walk outside of my apartment and sit at the top of the stairs and read my bible and talk to God. I said to God, that the way that I am feeling right now, Psychiatrist would say, I am having a bi-polar episode, but I just can’t accept that anymore……….Instead I told God that even though I am not sure why, I act the way I do…I just want it to stop and I want to get better. I told God that I don’t care why I act or feel this way, I just want to be better person. So, open up my bible and begin to read Psalms 40 and 42. and in those two chapters, some verses stood out to me:
Psalms 40:1- I Waited patiently for the Lord: and He inclined unto me, and heard my cry.
Psalms 40:2- He brought me up also out of an horrible pit, out of the miry clay, and set my feet upon a rock and established my going
Psalms 40:3- He hath put a new song in my mouth, even praise unto our God: many shall see it, and fear, and shall trust in the Lord
Psalms 42:8-Yet the Lord will command his loving kindness in the daytime, and in the night his song shall be with me and my prayer unto the God of my life
Psalms 42:9- I will say unto God my rock. Why hast thou forgotten me? why go I mourning because of the oppression of the enemy
Psalms 42:10-As with a sword in my bones, mine enemies reproach me;while they say daily unto me, Where is thy God.
I hope and pray this helps someone as well, to maybe find a path to established thier goings. We all need guidance- I say, start with God.
Love you all!!! And God bless