I know I am going back and forth about this mental illness that the “doctors” supposedly diagnose me with. For the longest I have been on and off medication and for the past 2 years or more, I have not been taking any meds at all. And I think I have been doing well. I know in my previous post I said that I was going to get back on my medication but for some reason:I am sitting back thinking,trying to convince myself that I do need them but my heart is saying something different.
Before 17 years old, I was fine… Yes I was emotionally abused, alone, suffered with an eating disorder (kind of still do, but by the grace of God I am controlling my eating), cried so much everyday, lived in fear and had a very bad temper —-I believe my temper is under control because of God, not saying that there want be a day that something will make me explode but I learn to not let every little thing get me angry, I have learn to let things go. Everything mention above came from my past and what was done to me at an early age
So, I am at this point of starting to believe that my situation that was diagnose as an mental illness might just be
satan trying to kill me (In the bible it says, satan is here to kill steal and destroy) http://www.biblestudytools.com/asv/john/10-10.html, Now I am not saying that a situation can’t be from mental illness but my situation is different. I believe that if you are on the medicine, start going back to your past to see what made you start taking the medication—this does not mean get off it completely because you have found out why you are taking it, but just don’t be on the medicine all your life not ever thinking about what caused you to start taking the medicine in the first place.
So, the reason why I have not decide to get back on the medication is because I feel in my heart that this is a spiritual attack and
satan is trying to ruin what God has for me. If you take the pill only on occasions when you feel like you need it. Start thinking about your past and what started you on the meds.
This is just my opinion and I believe that it might help someone who wants to stop or they don’t believe that they are mentally ill. If you have been on the meds for a while don’t just quit cold turkey. That was my decision and in my heart I believe that I really did not need the meds as the doctor said that I needed them.
For a while I am going to monitor myself and stay in my word everyday. And if I see a change in my behavior and the way I think from spending genuine time with God constantly and consistently…. Then He will be my medication everyday…..I will not miss a day spending time with Him ever again. Whether it is reading my bible, talking to him, praying, fasting, or meditating.I will spend time with Him. I should of done this along time go ( I have but not consistently) . I sing to God all the time because that is the voice He gave me I am going to share it with Him all the time as well 🙂
For a whole month starting today ( 06/08/2016 Wednesday) I will decide the fate of: Spiritual Attack or Mental illness
TO BE CONT……….