Pain Hidden Behind A Smile!

Hidden pain

Last night, I had a very long talk with a love one,who, when every time I looked at her she was always smiling and in good spirits. But I’ve come to find out that the smile I was seeing was to hide the fact that she was hurting and in dire pain. As I spoke with her, she spilled her heart out and I sat there and let my ears do the listening.

What she told me still sticks to my heart and runs through my mind. And I cry for her to God. I cry for her spiritually and physically for her and her beautiful children. After hearing her story and the journey she is about to embark on, I sit back and wonder why people feel that they have to always be strong on the inside? Why can’t you just let go and cry out to the heavens? Really,give it to God and cry out to Him?

Why do we allow a smile to hide our pain when we have a voice!? I can answer those questions for you:

  1. People are too judgmental! We don’t need YOU judging me, when I am trying to confidently tell you about what I am holding in my heart.
  2. We want trust! I do not want you going and telling people about my problems just so it can benefit your “Gossipy Spirit” .
  3. I call or I choose to speak to you about what I am dealing with and I just want you to listen. I do not want your OPINION! If I want your OPINION, I will ask for your OPINION.
  4. If I want to be by myself for a while and I don’t answer your call. Please don’t ignore me or move out of my life. I just want to  get away from the world for a while.  I promise that I still LOVE YOU!
  5. Try to be understandable. You might not have been where they have been and probably don’t and will not understand their situation. And that is OK! It probably was not meant for you to understand in the first place. Just listen (Look at #3) and be there for them. They might not say it! But they need you more than you will ever know
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4 Year Anniversary

 

memoir-pic

 

This year marks 4 years since I’ve been with Word Press and blogging my heart away. I should have more than 183 posts…. I will do better this year. I wonder if I could hit a 1,000 at the least or maybe even more? I have to stop letting life challenges get in the way of what I see as a “Memoir Of My Life for the world to read.

I shall and I will do better……

Sometimes you have to let go!

We meet people in life and think they will be there forever! But you have to realize that sometimes they are there to do what God needs to do. And then you have people that will be there for the rest of your life. Do not hold on to someone when God is telling you to let go. Do not hold on to someone that does not want to be apart of your life because you want them in your life.

Value and Respect who you are and know that you are worth it!

 

One Sweet Day!

On Mother’s Day, I decided to sing One Sweet Day by Mariah Carey and Boyz to Men. I am amazed that I sang this song without breaking down crying. This song is also dedicated to the many that do not have a mom anymore. I feel your pain… Sing with me…

One day, I will see my mom again. And when we meet I will never let her go……

 

 

Happy Mother’s Day!

I share with you, my mother.  It has now been 9 years since the last time I bought a gift and said.” Happy Mother’s Day!” to my mother. I will never get to see her beautiful smile and hear her say.” Thank You” and feel that motherly hug and love. This is a very emotional video… so grab a tissue…….

Here as in Heaven

I love when God comes to visit. This video will show how God moves. I do sing a little- So, I pray that you are touch and God comes to visit you as well. Love you!

 

 

Is Jacksonville the place for me?

I wonder if I am wasting my time in Jacksonville as far as my singing goes? I feel like I can start here but I would need to move on soon… But maybe God has a story for me to tell in Jacksonville? I did say, I want to impact the world with what God is doing with my voice.  And I am not looking for fame either… So, what could it be?

 

 

 

Memoir of Priscilla Walker

This year last month my mother had passed away ( April 15, 2009) and I share my memories of her. Nothing much that I can say…… But here is my heart… Listen!

Maybe It’s Too Late!!!

In this video, I am talking about auditioning for Channel News 4 to sing the National Anthem. It was actually a competition to sing the National Anthem, which was called: “Oh Say Can You Sing”. I did get a callback but I never went on to be a semi-finalist. But this video goes on to talk about if I am too late to become a singer and do what I love? Since this video, I struggle with my age and if it’s too late but I still push on to accomplish my singing mission to impact the world.

 

 

Being at my lowest

Sometimes you just want to go into hiding and never come out. I have to learn to keep moving and pushing on. It is ok to be down for a while, but you have to keep it moving so that you can show the world how God used you and what you have become from your situation. Since this video, I have grown and have moved on from this season. Sometimes I wonder what else is next in my life that will cause me to grow and become better.