I’ve never really embraced who I was until today. I am starting to embrace my size, becomes I know I will lose weight and see a new me, soon. I come to the realization that if I do not accept where I am now, I am not going to get where I need to be. So, I am beautiful at this size and I will be beautiful at the size I want to be.
PS. Take it slow. Do not rush life or you are going to miss all the beauty that God created for you on this earth. Look past all the evil that satan wants you to see. If you look through God’s eyes you will see what man can not see. All man wants you to see is the bad in everything, so that you can blame God. But if you just spend time with God, you will see the evil mask that covered God’s beauty. Look at the BEAUTY in GOD’S EYES
I am excited about what has happened since the last time I blogged! I finally went to the gym! Planet Fitness to be exact! I started Sunday 12am to Wednesday 12am. My husband and I go late because it is not that many people there. I know I have not been blogging what I eat consecutively but that will change today.
I am going to start with what I ate Wednesday at work. I can’t remember everything but I will do my best to remember.
March 29th 2017Wednesday
From PDQ: Honey Butter Sandwich with Grilled Chicken/Bacon, Fries and a Ginger ale
From PDQ: 8 Crispy Nuggets ( I ate this while I was working)
Coffee Bottle of Ginger ale -It’s crazy but I truly believe that is all I ate!
March 30th 2017 Thursday
From PDQ: 2 oz cups of baked almonds/7 crispy nuggets From PDQ: Grilled Chicken Sandwich with cheese and pickles and Fries 2 cups of ginger- ale From PDQ: Peanut Butter Chocolate Chip Cookie ( Only ate because I was hungry) 3 teaspoons of Nutella -at the end of shift I had a cup of water
That will be all for now. I think things are starting to look a little better for me, I even feel my body changing a little. I also feel more energetic since working out
Ok, Guys! I have not been doing too well with the eating. I’ve changed my title for this journey of being a healthier me because I am having trouble with staying away from foods that are good to my taste buds and inner fat girl!. I work in a restaurant that has nothing but crispy chicken, burgers, fried zucchini, fries that are put in grease and cooked to golden perfection! but on the other hand there are grilled options as well. See the problem is, is that when I am burning calories by walking back forth and cleaning when there’s time to clean. I think in my mind that I should eat something fattening that way I will not be hungry later on.
I do not mind eating grilled, matter of fact I love grilled. But I feel that when I moved around so much in the restaurant, that by eating grilled I will become hungry more quickly. I don’t know! May be I need to look up about calories and what to eat so that you will not get hungry so fast?
Here is my list of what I ate on (03/24/2017) and (03/25/2017):
-Cup of coffee ( at night time at PDQ – where I work) I was very tired. I did back to back doubles: 10am-10pm)
-Buffy Bleu Crispy Tender Sandwich w/fries ( was very hungry)
-1/2 peanut butter cookie
-Cup of heath bits (2oz) – Only because of energy ( I was very tired)
-6 crispy nuggets
-2 grilled tenders
This list above is throughout the day not in one setting.
-5 Crispy Tenders 4 dip in buffy bleu sauce and 1 tender by itself with ranch dipping sauce
-1 cup of ginger ale
-1/2 peanut butter chocolate chip
-1 crispy tender
I know above looks very bad, but I really do hope that at the end, I still have good results. I still have about 9 months to go until 2018. Hopefully I will see a new me. But the way things are going, it seems very unfortunate! But we shall see.
Here is my video vlog of what I ate yesterday ( 03/21/2017 Tuesday) Hope this let’s people see that I have struggles or am having struggles with food. I will talk about the good food I eat and the bad. I am human and I need to show my struggles. I hope this helps someone. I am not happy with my weight but I will get to my goal! God Bless
Today I am not too proud of myself. Within 6 days I gained 6 ounces. So I was 272.0 now I am 272.6 from the 14th of March till now ( 20th of March). I know most of it could of been the sodas and I know that I really went hard on food yesterday. Here is what I ate:
1. Small cup of coffee ( cream and sugar)
2. I had two small cheese burgers with a fry and medium Ginger ale ( I did not drink all it) Cherry/reg gingerale- $3.29 deal at Burger King
3.Grilled chicken sandwich/fry with a large cup of water with a splash of H-Ci strawberry
4 ( Because I got irritated) I ate 2 large snicker crisper’s and I had a bag of hot fries- I did not eat the whole bag
5. I did drink some water but enough like I should
So, that completes it. I am not happy with how I ate yesterday ( March 19th 2017 Sunday) but I will Do Better!
I have not really been posting like I should because of work. But here is a video of what’s been going on. I lost a pound and 6 ounces in 2 weeks ( March 7th-14th).I have been slowly taking my time in the whole food eating process. I have not done away with anything but I have kind of cut back. I still eat what I want but I do it sporadically. I know in my other post I said,”That I made a list of what I will and what I want eat”, but I need to do this differently. Just stopping cold turkey (from everything) is not going to help me. I am going to have to go in rehab (personally and mentally) and slowly do the best I can. This is going to be hard but satisfactory to my body. I do from time to time look at my list of what I will not eat and so forth, it helps me a little. But I know consciously that I am on the right track. I was 273.6 and I went down to 272.0. So I am not sike about it because I know I will and can do better. Take a look at the video, this not just for others but for myself as well.
As I said before: I am trying something different. This weight loss journey is about finding Erica and what works for me and not only losing the weight but keeping it off!
As you see above this is a picture that I took today to show you what I look like now. In this picture I weigh: 273.00 pds. And most of it is in my stomach. I am disgusted of how I have let myself go and I pray that once the weight falls off, it will never come back again. Here is a vlog of day #1 of a Healthier Singer! I am making these videos to keep myself motivated and to help other’s who are struggling just like me.
THIS IS GOD’S TEMPLE and I need to take care of it!
This year I am on to a healthier ME and I am going to do my best to keep my weight off, once I lose it. Starting tomorrow, I made a list of what I will not eat and what I will eat. I am going to stick to that. I have voided all foods that make me want to over eat and I am addicted to. I am going to be documenting, via video and blog. I will weigh myself tomorrow and post it either as a video or blog.
I think the video is more efficient. And I will take before and after pictures,as well. So, by April (When I will be taking pictures for my music website and July- I will be on a cruise)- So by those times I should be transforming to a new ME. I am documenting my life of weight loss because I want to be an advocate for women that go through what I am going through-I will explain in the video what I mean. Anyways look forward to my videos and my life transforming. I also will talk about a tragic ending that happened this past week…. Stay TUNE!
I love sharing my heart because I feel what I share from it will help others who watch my video.
What makes this singing video special is how it connects with what I heard at church today ( http://fathomchurchjax.com/) I sung this song on Saturday and then at church today a guest speaker talked about giving your heart and surrendering to God. I was amazed because I sung the song (I surrender all). It is amazing how God connects things together.
What makes it all more beautiful is when I cried. You remember when I told you that it seems like I was angry with God or I have a hard time speaking with Him? Well, what I figure out was that it was not God. I believe that I was harboring what was happening to me and my husband at the time and I did not realize how it effected me. It was that bad, to the point, there were no feelings involved, no crying. Just pushing through and being content where I was ( it mentally mess me up). So, that day at church I poured my heart out and tears poured down like I’ve been holding those tears for the longest.And it felt like my heart was being relieve from the pain I was holding on the inside. When I let those tears go, I felt like my heart was saying,”let it ALL go”!
Please listen to the whole video. And listen to my Heart!